


fantasy

by thisisthefamilybusiness



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout: New Vegas
Genre: Angst and Porn, Dom/sub Undertones, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Masturbation, One-Sided Relationship, Pining, Power Play Undertones, Religious Guilt, Sad Mormon Pining, Sexual Fantasy, Undertones of Internalized Homophobia, Voice Kink, uhh basically daniel has a Spooky Mormon Sex Fantasy about joshua
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 06:32:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,211
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13048452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisisthefamilybusiness/pseuds/thisisthefamilybusiness
Summary: The Burned Man. Joshua, with his eyes constantly narrowed into slits when he looked at Daniel, like Daniel was another naïve fool from New Canaan who didn’t understand the first damn thing about tribal politics. Like Daniel was an annoyance to him.Joshua, with his voice like a gravel road, his fingertips tracing over a passage of the Bible as he read.Go forth, O ye daughters of Zion, and behold King Solomon with the crown wherewith his mother crowned him in the day of his espousals, and in the day of the gladness of his heart.Daniel reaches under the thin wool blanket with a soft sigh.





	fantasy

**Author's Note:**

> dedicated to the mr. new vegas fanclub who enables me too much

It’s a sin.

But like he has learned so many times since Daniel left New Canaan, sometimes there is no way to find resolution besides sin.

And that’s all this is, surely: a problem needing resolution. Once the act has been committed Daniel’s mind will be freed of these thoughts, and he can return to how his life should be.

(In the recesses of his mind, he knows that isn’t true. This is a only a symptom of a larger problem, and to it, Daniel can see no resolution.)

So Daniel waits for the dark of the night to fall over the camp, until everyone except for the night watch is asleep. He turns off his lamp and takes a deep breath in as he tugs his clothes off, slides into his cot.

 _The Burned Man_. Joshua, with his eyes constantly narrowed into slits when he looked at Daniel, like Daniel was another naïve fool from New Canaan who didn’t understand the first damn thing about tribal politics. Like Daniel was an annoyance to him.

Joshua, with his voice like a gravel road, his fingertips tracing over a passage of the Bible as he read. _Go forth, O ye daughters of Zion, and behold King Solomon with the crown wherewith his mother crowned him in the day of his espousals, and in the day of the gladness of his heart._

Daniel reaches under the thin wool blanket to touch himself with a soft sigh. Should he not bear more shame? Should this action not humiliate him?

But there is no guilt to curdle his stomach, just the tension of nascent arousal as he wraps a hand around himself.

What sort of lover would Joshua be? He held the potential for terrible violence within himself, but he would not be cruel. Joshua was efficient in all things, but he was not cruel—he simply did not shy away if the most effective solution involved bloodshed. Would he be equally shrewd as a lover? Would the newfound temperance in him shine through?

Would it be blasphemy if Daniel worshipped Joshua, as Solomon’s wife worshipped him? If Joshua growled that Daniel owed him penance, what could Daniel do but fall to his knees and give it? Daniel’s lips would linger over Joshua’s fingertips, tracing over the lines of his bandages until Joshua deigned him the privilege of unwrapping at least his hand, so Daniel could trace softly with his mouth the mottled scars.

And certainly, yes, Joshua would look like no other man, with his body covered in heavy patches of scar tissue, but Daniel does not desire men, he desires only Joshua. Would his skin be more or less sensitive where it had been burned? Would Joshua desire the softness of Daniel’s tongue or the scrape of his teeth?

Daniel would give either to him. Whatever Joshua’s desire, he would eagerly submit. An image came, unbidden, into Daniel’s mind: Joshua’s hand seeking purchase in Daniel’s hair to tug him where he was most desired, Joshua sliding two fingers of his free hand into Daniel’s mouth, pressing against his tongue as if testing the space. Daniel would gag, undoubtedly, the taste of painkilling salve acrid and his gag reflex too sensitive to stand the prodding of Joshua’s questing fingers. Would Joshua simply enjoy the sight of Daniel, reduced to obscenity by unholy desire and Joshua’s own will, his face flushed and his mouth red? Or would he sneer, his eyes sharp and glittering in the lamplight, at the image? The holy Canaanite, reduced to sin by his fallen brother-in-mission, on his knees and eager for anything Joshua saw fit to give.

Daniel gasps and tightens his hand around himself.

Joshua’s voice would only deepen with lust. Would he recite the Song of Songs? _Awake, O north wind; and come, thou south; blow upon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits._ Holy Scripture, rendered explicit by Joshua’s tongue, by the heat in his gaze when his eyes would pass over Daniel. Would his finger pause in its place in the passage as Joshua looked at him, naked and kneeling with his desire plain to see?

Whatever Joshua’s desire, Daniel was sure to seek to fulfill it. He would do such wanton things, wouldn’t he? Debauch himself thoroughly, render himself sick with lust as he eagerly took whatever Joshua saw fit to offer him—fingers tugging at his hair, a cock in his mouth, taking his pleasure from Daniel in all ways. Daniel had not lain with anyone before—would it please Joshua to know that he was the first to reduce Daniel to base desire, the only one Daniel has ever desired so terribly? Or would he view chastity as a burden, think it a chore to have to teach Daniel how to best please him?

Shame curls in Daniel’s gut but it only drives his pleasure higher, speeds his hand around his cock.

Joshua wouldn’t hesitate to use Daniel for his own pleasure. This is atonement, he would hiss, and Daniel would not understand what he is atoning for but he would accept it anyway. Let Joshua take away his dignity; Daniel has no need for it, nor need for thought. Let Joshua consume his very being in fire and passion. He would gladly accept him as a new god, leave offerings of lips and tongue in worship against Joshua’s body. Would Joshua slap him for his blasphemy and depravity? It would sting against Daniel’s cheek, knock his teeth together, as Joshua snarled that Daniel should be better than this, better than such undignified behavior—

And that, embarrassingly, is what pushes Daniel into orgasm.

* * *

Daniel has avoided Joshua for as long as he can, guilt burdening him every time he thinks of the other man.

How can he ever look Joshua in the eyes again? He has not just harbored desire, but put upon Joshua the weight of his own perversions.

But Joshua is not a fool, and Daniel cannot avoid him forever. While Daniel is dropping off a crate of supplies, Joshua corners him.

“Are you well?” There is genuine concern in Joshua’s tone, and Daniel swallows hard, flushing. He does not deserve kindness after what he has done. “I have not seen you in a while.”

“I’ve been very busy, it’s gecko breeding season,” Daniel says hastily. It is not a lie, but it also is not the truth—for how can Daniel be truthful now?

“Ah.” But Joshua’s eyes are still probing, as if he knows Daniel isn’t telling him something important, as if he was frustrated. “Well, God be with you,” he says after the longest moment of Daniel’s life, and he leaves.

“Shit,” Daniel murmurs, closing his eyes. What was he going to do? Could Daniel truly confess his sin to Joshua, to clear his conscience—and if he did, what reaction could he even anticipate from him? Disgust, most likely, and betrayal. Joshua likely had no sexual interest in Daniel, or even for men.

Their alliance had been fit to be one of the most important things to happen to Zion, and Daniel had thrown it all away for a single moment of sin.

**Author's Note:**

> can I get uhhhh another rarepair 
> 
> (PSA: I'm not dead or anything, I just didn't have access to a computer for about a week!)
> 
> talk to me on [on tumblr](http://officialclaricestarling.tumblr.com) | [coffee](https://ko-fi.com/clstarling/)


End file.
